


An Abundance of Expletives and the Most Unhelpful of Neighbours

by orphan_account



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-13
Updated: 2019-08-13
Packaged: 2020-08-20 21:48:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20234908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Dan Howell would procrastinate death if it were to turn up on his doorstep. The stakes are lower now, fortunately, but that doesn't stop him from waiting until the last three hours to start working on his assignment for his Data Protection and European Privacy course (yay, law school). Problem: the WiFi is out and he needs to do research. Solution: ask the (probably friendly? very tall) neighbour if he can use his network.





	An Abundance of Expletives and the Most Unhelpful of Neighbours

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for a challenge, which is why it's so short (max word count was 550). I never write real people fanfiction (Hamilton doesn't count) so this was... odd? Hope you like it tho :)

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.” Dan tries to get up from his kneeled position below his desk and promptly hits his head. “God fucking fuck.”

It’s three hours before the deadline of his essay for his European Data Protection and Privacy course (yawn) and the Wi-Fi network has ceased to exist. Punching the router several times resulted in nothing but back cramps and a headache. Procrastination has failed him and now he’s got three hours to find a working Wi-Fi network and write an entire essay. The smart thing to do would be to just race to the library and do it there, but that’s a level of social interaction and physical activity that Dan’s lack of morning routine did not prepare him for.

“Fucking shit.”

He knows he could write it in three hours, he just needs an internet connection to gather some sources.

“Fuck.”

He could also try his neighbours. The guy living across from him seemed alright, they once made eye contact in the elevator while the lady living upstairs was ranting about gay propaganda. That’s a good base for interaction, right?

So, he gathers all his fears of not handing in his essay on time and failing miserably and uses it to propel his anti-social existence forward until he arrives at his neighbour’s front door. He hesitates for a second when he gets there, turns around and then mentally slaps himself for almost giving up, before he knocks on the door.

It isn’t long before the door is opened by a tall guy in the most obnoxiously coloured sweatpants Dan has ever seen.

“Hi, I’m your neighbour, Dan. I was wondering if I could maybe use your Wi-Fi for a few hours? Just until I’ve submitted this thing I need to do for my data protection course?” Dan tries to look unintimidating and approachable in an attempt to get this virtual stranger to allow him to use his network.

His neighbour looks sceptic for a second and then shakes his head. “Sorry mate, I can’t, I’m not letting some stranger just use my Wi-Fi network. My pal’s a computer science major and he’s lectured me all about the risks.”

Internally, Dan is screaming.

“Yeah, sure, I totally understand, sorry for bothering you.” The screaming hasn’t stopped yet.

“It’s alright, good luck with your thing.” His neighbour resolutely closes the door in his face.

Dan stands there for a second, quietly.

“Fuck.”

He kind of just wants to give up, who even cares about data protection and privacy?

He’s still in the hallway, it’s empty and deserted. He shrugs, sighs some more. He does some internal cursing and debating and then gets out his phone.

** _To: fringe mate_ ** ** _  
_ ** _ hey loser, wanna come get owned at mario kart? _

** _From: fringe mate_ ** __   
_ Yeah sure _ __   
_ I’ll pick up some snacks on the way? _ _   
_ __ Also you’re losing big time

** _To: fringe mate_ ** _   
_ _ thanks love you _

** _From: fringe mate_ ** ** _  
_ ** _ Love you too x _

** _To: fringe mate_ ** __   
_ don’t be cheesy _ _   
_ __ or i’ll force you to eat an entire cheese platter

** _From: fringe mate_ ** _   
_ _ kinky _

** _To: fringe mate_ ** __   
_ o my god i hate you _ _   
_ __ why are we even dating?

** _From: fringe mate_ ** _   
_ _ :) _

And now he’s blushing like an idiot in front of a random neighbour’s door. What a day.


End file.
